Sleep will come when I’m ready…
Told Pammy she’s driving tomorrow, so I’m catching up on videos while everyone is sleeping. Still too excited to sleep anyway…the adrenaline has been pumping, and I can’t seem to wipe this grin off my face…I’ve noticed my attitude is slowly becoming infectious…hoping by the end of next week, my two road buddies can shake the shit that’s got a hold on them and fully embrace the heart of the moment. They seem like they want to.
Jeff’s playing was like night and day between the show on the 5th and the show on the 6th and it’s cool watchin’ Pam get lost in rocking out with her harmonica or the washboard. I love planting seeds of creativity, then watching them blossom. Really all I do is try to nip the thoughts of self doubt in the bud and then dwell on fun stuff…damn my optimism. For the most part, I can usually make the best out of any situation, not always the easiest thing to do, but when you combine it with being resourceful as fuck, you can pretty much have a good time in the middle of nowhere, and I spend a lot of time in the middle of nowhere and making a party out of it.
I’m sure I’m supposed to be learning something from this too, but I won’t expect much of that to happen until we start to run out of gas money, or we blow a tire or something. Shit’s starting out way too easy for it to be like this the whole trip. A pocket full of gas paper, a box full of food, and I made it through my whole period without wanting to rip someone’s head off…this has got to be the calm before the storm…or maybe I should count my blessings and not question it. I used to question why Dan loved me. I figured he was either stupid or a glutton for punishment…turns out he really does love me for the crazy fuckin’ bitch that I am, and that’s pretty rad…but I don’t have eight and a half years to shake my fear of everything going too smoothly, I’ve got less than 2 months of this trip now…and it’s fun.
Today, Pam got to hang with a childhood friend who came out to the show, so I relieved her of her duties and let her hang out. I know the opportunity for that won’t happen for her often, and I really want her to get the most out of this trip. It can’t be all work and no play…and I know there will be times when I will want to just kick it with my friends or have my solitude.
I started to get frustrated when she didn’t want to go anywhere without me, but then I remember when I first started touring with The Athiarchists, so I chilled out…when you’re in unfamiliar territory, and you’re still feeling out the boundaries of what exactly being a road dog demands, it’s a lot easier and more comfortable to stick with what you know. I never left the pack until the day I decided to go busk by myself on the streets of Hollywood. It was hard for me to leave the comforts of the hotel room…which was really just hard to leave the side of Aaron and Dano, but I grabbed my bass and said goodbye, even though I was secretly hoping someone would go with me.
I played my little heart out with the 6 songs or so that I had, met some cool peeps (mostly other buskers, a hobo who shared his iced tea with me, and some other cool peeps that would easily fit in the “street urchin” catagory by most jackasses), made a dollar, and had a really good time.
Well, I am learning some things, I guess just not as much so far as I had hoped for. We haven’t really had any long drives yet, and that’s where I do my best thinking…I can’t wait for a long drive under a blanket of stars, got a taste of it on our way to Leavenworth…but I want to gulp it all in, and maybe stop to fill the tank once so I can gulp it in some more as I catch a sunrise.
Anyway, here’s the 3 videos I uploaded in the wee hours of the morning. I’m really loving the new cab…the twang sound is gone, and I think you can hear the bass a lot more clear through it. Makes me happy. I’m gonna go take advantage of some private shower time, then pack up my shit and catch a few zzz’s before waking up my buddies. Got a long haul tomorrow and Pam’s gonna get a lot of freeway driving experience when the sun comes up.